Companies Running Out of Names for New Smartphones

"Astro," "Bonzai," and "Gladiator" were considered for this phone

LIBERTYVILLE, IL – Phone company executives around the world acknowledged they are quickly running out of names for their smartphones. Motorola chief technology officer Tony Ja said that the industry is reaching “Peak Name,” when all of the cool and plausible phone names will already have been used.

“Inspire, Thunderbolt, Droid, Droid X, Galaxy, Desire,” Ja said. “Those are pretty good names. But there’s only so many words in the dictionary, and soon we’ll have more phones than words.”

Companies like HTC, Samsung, and Nokia, among others, release new smartphones constantly. As the technology quickly improves, phones companies must deliver new products to keep up with the times. However, because companies cannot or will not upgrade phone software via updates or downloads, consumers are forced to purchase new hardware. With new phones come new names.

“There are tons of new phones slated to come out,” Tim Horowitz of CNET said. “But frankly, they sound kind of lame. ‘Meteor,’ ‘Aurora,’ and ‘Laser’. Really? ‘Laser’?”

Other names of phones include “Horizon,” “Nautilus,” “Tubular,” and “Marconi”. There is also the “Flame,” “Sonic,” “Robin,” and “Awesome”.

“They’re just getting sloppy,” Horowitz continued. “I mean, it’s like they’re picking words at random. I guess they’ve used up everything good.”

“Heck, even the iPhone is just reusing their own name. What’s the next one, the iPhone 5? Real original, guys,” Horowitz added.

“We believe that tablets are the next big thing,” Wallace Stanton, president of HTC America, said. “So we’re saving our good names for those. But even then, we’re running out of names. We can only go back to the well so many times. And that well is It’s tough.”

Stanton threw up his hands and sighed. “We might as well try and get ahead of the competition and just call ours the ‘Best’ phone or ‘Better’ tablet.”

“Actually, that’s not a bad idea,” he added.


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